Here goes nothing...

I honestly never thought I would be doing one of these "blog" things. Something lit up in me as I was sitting on the toilet (yes, I am guilty of poop n surfing) listening to music and on facebook making a status. Now I wish I could say I was taking a nice mighty poo, but I wasn't I don't even think I pissed either, I just sat there as words spilled outta me. I don't even update my status much either, so wtf. I guess that's how my first post came to be..


I can’t remember the last time i had a nightmare, but I just woke up in tears. It felt so real. Even though it’s starting to escape me now.. the feeling.. the fear and sadness won’t leave me for a while.. I’m sure of it. 

The beginning is fuzzy as always. Somehow I was in the back of a military truck with family and friends. There was three of them trucks and guns lots of guns. All through the while I was having flashbacks of happier times.I saw my sisters and my brother, my mother and my father all smiling. Somehow my brother was in the truck and a few small children. We were laying down going through check points. I recognized some of the people as friends that I went to school with. I overheard that we were being under attack and there was an infiltration within our people. It didn’t look like were home…I didn’t know this land. All of a sudden the children kept moving around and looking out the truck. They told us that they needed to stop or look like a threat, but it was too late. We got shot at. I could see the bullets as if there were in slow motion, neon orange laser looking dashes. I knew it was a matter of time before one of those hit someone in this truck if not everyone. I could hear screams outside and sounds of war. I saw my brother get shot in the head several times.. and a few other people.. finally it I got hit in the stomach. I felt this hot sensation travel throughout my body. This isn’t real this isn’t real.. this isn’t real.. I kept saying.. but it felt so real. Somehow I’m able to see into one of the other trucks.. and I see someone in the front start shooting people.. I felt like I knew him.. but I can’t put my finger on who he was. I knew him long ago.. and I no longer did. I kept thinking.. where is everyone.. all those check points with friends and family we had just recently passed. Gone. They must all be gone. Some people tried to run away from the trucks, but they kept getting picked off. It was clear to see that no one would survive, no one would escape. I woke up trying to breathe normally.. as I laid there it took me a few seconds to realize what had happened. It was only a dream.. 

Campbell Soup

I just didn’t see you coming, and I don’t know why you’re here, and I’m trying not to like it too much, because I know I do. 

"I try, it’s safe to say, some
Don’t change.”

"Don’t know how it all got started,
I don’t know what they’re doin’ with their lives.
But me, I’m still on the road
Headin’ for another joint